The Labyrinth of the World and the Paradise of the Heart

Jan Ámos Komenský

Chapter 1

CHAPTER I

REASONS FOR UNDERTAKING THE WANDERINGS

Having reached the age when human intelligence begins to distinguish between good and evil, and having seen the various classes, orders, callings, occupations, and professions that men engage in, it seemed to me highly desirable to consider well which of these groups of folk I should join and which profession I should choose for my life work.

FICKLENESS OF MIND

2 After spending much time and thought on this problem, and having earnestly considered it, I finally decided to live with the least amount of trouble and labor with the greatest degree of comfort, peace, and good cheer.

3 However, I found it difficult to discover which profession this might be. Moreover, I did not know with whom to take proper counsel about the matter. For I was unwilling to ask the advice of just anyone, presuming that each would naturally praise his own calling. On the other hand, I was loath to undertake anything in a hurry for fear of erring.

4 Nevertheless, I confess that I secretly attempted to take up now one, then another or a third thing, but soon dropped them all again, perceiving (as I thought) difficulties and trivialities in all of them. Meantime, I feared that my fickleness might bring me into derision; accordingly, I knew not what to do.

5 After much inward struggle and hesitation, it finally occurred to me to investigate first all human affairs under the sun, and after I had intelligently compared them one with another, to choose the profession that would enable me to live pleasantly and peacefully. The longer I thought of this plan, the better I liked it.

CHAPTER II

THE PILGRIM OBTAINS MR. UBIQUITOUS FOR HIS GUIDE

Thereupon I sauntered out by myself and began to consider where and how I should begin. Then suddenly, I know not whence, there appeared before me a brisk-gaited, spry-looking, and loquacious fellow whose feet, eyes, and tongue were as if on a turn-table. He approached me, inquiring where I had come from and whither I was going. I answered him that I had left my home to travel about the world in order to gain knowledge.

THE WORLD A LABYRINTH

2 He approved, but added: "But where is your guide?" "I have none; I trust God and my eyes not to lead me astray, " I answered. "You will accomplish nothing," he replied; "have you ever heard of the Cretan labyrinth?" "Yes, a little," I assented. "It was one of the wonders of the world," he continued; "a building with so many rooms, partitions, and passages that anyone entering it without a guide was doomed to wander and grope about it without ever finding his way out. That, however, was a mere joke in comparison with the arrangement of the labyrinth of this world, especially in our day. Take the advice of an experienced man and do not trust yourself into it alone!"

DESCRIPTION OF AN INSOLENT MAN

3 "But where shall I seek such a guide?" I inquired. "It is my work, " he answered, "to conduct those whose desire to see and investigate the world, and to guide and show them whatever there is; that is why I came to meet you." "Who are you, my dear fellow?" I asked in amazement. "My name is Searchall, and I am nicknamed Ubiquitous," he replied. "I go up and down the world peering into all its nooks and inquiring into what men say and do. I see all that is to be seen and ferret and spy out all that is secret. In short, nothing should be done without me, for it is my duty to oversee all things. If you follow me, I would let you into many secrets which you otherwise could never find alone."

4 Hearing such news, I was overjoyed to find such a leader and begged him not to consider it troublesome to guide me through the world. "Gladly I serve others," he replied, "gladly shall I serve you." Thereupon, taking me by the hand, he said: "Let us go!" So we started, I remarking: "I am indeed curious to see the course of the world, and whether one can safely rely on anything." Hearing this, my companion stopped and said: "My friend, if you are undertaking this journey, intending to judge what you see in accordance with your own opinions instead of being pleased with whatever you find, I know not how Her Majesty, our Queen, will be satisfied."

VANITY, THE QUEEN OF THE WORLD

5 "And who is your Queen?" I inquired. "She who directs the world and its entire course from one end to the other," he replied. "Her name is Wisdom, although some dunces dub her Vanity. Let me warn you beforehand against prying overmuch into things, when we journey about and investigate, or you will come to grief, and so may I!"

CHAPTER III

MR. DELUSION JOINS THE TRAVELLERS

while he was thus conversing with me, someone appeared at our side--I could not tell whether it was a man or a woman (for the fellow was strangely disguised and as if in a haze). "Where are you taking this man, Ubiquitous?" he inquired. "On a world tour," replied my companion; "for he desires to examine it."

2 "Why without me?" queried the stranger, "you know that it is your duty to guide, while it is mine to show whatever there is to see. It is Her Majesty's will that no one, having entered her realm, should himself interpret, as he pleases, what he sees and hears, indulging his own wit. For the scenes should be explained to him and he remain content therewith."

3 "Is there anyone so insolent as not to accept our order, just as all the rest do?" retorted Ubiquitous, "nevertheless, it seems to me that this fellow may require a bridle. Come along, then!" The stranger joined us, and we continued our journey.

HABITS OF DELUDING THE WORLD

4 I, however, thought to myself: "I hope to God that I shall not be misled. These fellows intend to place some sort of bridle on me." Thereupon, I spoke to the newcomer: "Friend, do not be offended; but I would like to know your name." "I am the interpreter of Wisdom, Queen of the world, and am under her orders to instruct men how all things in the world ought to be understood," he answered. "Accordingly, I instill into the minds of all you will meet, both old and young, well-born and commoners, foolish and learned, all that pertains to true worldly wisdom. Thus I give them joy and contentment. For without me even kings, princes, nobles, and all the most distinguished people would find themselves in a strange state of despondency, and would pass their earthly days in sorrow."

5 "How fortunate that God has sent you as my guide, dear friend, if what you say is true!" I exclaimed, "for I have started on this journey in order to find the most reliable and delightful thing in the world, so that I may lay hold of it. Having you for my counsellor, I shall be able to choose more easily." "Have no doubt about it," he rejoined, "for although you will find everything in our kingdom excellently and splendidly ordered and jolly, and will learn that all who are willing to obey our Queen never fail of a comfortable living; it is, nevertheless, true that some professions or businesses have more comfort and leisure than others. You will be able to choose among them as you please. I shall explain all that is necessary to you." "What then is your name?" I inquired. "My name is Delusion."

CHAPTER IV

THE PILGRIM IS BRIDLED AND BESPECTACLED

Hearing this, I was horrified at the thought of what fine companions I had acquired. One of them (I mused) had made mention of a bridle. The other was named Delusion. He spoke of his Queen as Vanity (although that seemed to have been an unguarded slip of the tongue). What next?

2 Accordingly, as I walked on in silence, with downcast eyes and unwilling, halting steps, Searchall exclaimed: "How now, you weathercock, I suspect you are minded to turn back!" Before I had time to answer, he threw a bridle over my neck, the bit of which slipped quickly into my mouth. He remarked at the same time: "Now you will be more willing to persevere in what you have begun."

THE BRIDLE OF VANITY

3 I examined the bridle and found it was made of the headstall of Curiosity, the bit having been forged of the steel of Tenacity in undertakings. Then I understood that I should no longer journey through the world of my own will, as I had intended, but should be forcibly driven on by my mind's curiosity and my insatiable thirst for knowledge.

4 Just then Delusion on the other side remarked: "For my part, I present you with these glasses through which you must examine the world." After he fixed the glasses on my nose, everything immediately assumed a changed aspect. For they had the power (as I have tested many times afterwards) of making distant objecdts appear near and the near distant, of the small large and the large small, of the ugly things beautiful and the beautiful ugly, of the black white and the white black, and so on. Hence, I realized that it was not without good reason that he was called Delusion, since he could not make and impose such glasses upon mankind.

GROUND FROM ASSUMPTION AND HABIT

5 As I learned later, the lenses were ground from the glass of Assumption, and were set in horn-rims called Habit.

6 Fortunately, he placed them askew on my nose, so that they did not fit me properly and did not prevent me, when I raised my head, from looking under them and thus seeing things in their proper, natural aspect. This gladdened me, and I thought to myself: even though you stop my mouth and cover my eyes, yet I trust God that you will not be able to restrain my reason and my mind. I will go and see what kind of world this is that my Lady Vanity desires us to examine in her own fashion, but forbids us to look at with our own eyes!

CHAPTER V

THE PILGRIM LOOKS UPON THE WORLD FROM ABOVE

BEYOND THE WORLD THERE IS NOTHING. While I was thus musing, we suddenly found ourselves (I know not how) upon an exceedingly high tower, so that I seemed to touch the clouds. Looking down from this tower, I saw a city beautiful in appearance, shining, and prodigiously wide-spread, but not so great that I could not discern its limits and boundaries all around. The city formed a circle, and was surrounded with walls and ramparts, but instead of moats there yawned a gloomy abyss, to all appearances boundless and bottomless. Light shone only above the city, while beyond the walls it was pitch dark.

2 THE SITUATION OF THE WORLD. The city itself, as I perceived, was divided into innumerable streets, squares, houses and buildings both large and small. It swarmed with people as if with insects. Toward the east I saw a gate, from which an alley ran toward another gate facing the west. The second gate opened upon the streets of the city. I counted six principal streets running from east to west, parallel with each other. In the midst of these streets was a very large ring or marketplace. Farthest toward the west, upon a steep and rocky eminence, stood a lofty, magnificent castle toward which the inhabitants of the city frequently gazed.

3 THE GATE OF ENTERING AND THE GATE OF SEPARATION. My guide, Mr. Ubiquitous, remarked: "Behold, my pilgrim, here you have that fine world that you were so anxious to see! I brought you first to this elevation that you might survey it all and thus might understand its arrangement. The eastern gate is the gate of life, through which all who dwell on earth must enter. That other gate which is nearer to us is the gate of division, where all receive their lot in life and turn toward one or another calling.

4 SIX CLASSES OF THE WORLD. "The streets which you see are the various classes, orders, and professions in which men are settled. Observe the six principal streets: in the one toward the south dwells the domestic group--parents, children and servants; in the next dwell the craftsmen and the tradesman; in the third, nearest the market-place, are found the learned professions, devoted to the intellectual labors; on the other side, opposite them, is the clerical order, to which the rest resort for religious ministrations; beyond them are the governing and magisterial classes; and farthest to the north is the order of knights engaged in military affairs. How excellent it all is! The first beget all; the second sustain all; the third teach all; the fourth pray for all; the fifth judge and preserve good order among all; and the sixth fight for all. Thus all serve one another, and all live in harmony with each other.

5 THE CASTLE OF FORTUNE. "The castle toward the west is Arx Fortunate , the Castle of Fortune , where only the most distinguished people dwell in the enjoyment of wealth, pleasure, and glory.

THE COMMON SQUARE AND THE CASTLE OF THE WORLD. The central square is common to all. There men of all classes come together to transact their necessary business. In the center of it, as the hub of everything else, stands the residence of Wisdom, the queen of the world."

6 THE BEGINNING OF CONFUSION. I was pleased with this excellent arrangement and began to praise God for having disposed all classes in such splendid order. But one thing I disliked, namely, that streets intersected each other in many places, so that here and there they ran together. It seemed that this might result in confusion and straying. Moreover, as I gazed at the global shape of the world, I palpably felt it move and whirl in a circle until I feared to be overcome with dizziness. For wherever I cast my glance, everything to the least mote seemd to swarm before my eyes. Moreover, when I stopped to listen, the air was filled with the sounds of pounding, striking, shuffling, whispering, and screaming.

7 THERE WAS DELUSION TOO. My interpreter, Mr. Delusion, remarked: "You see, my dear fellow, how delightful this world is, and how splendid are all things in it, even though you view it only from afar. What will you say when you examine it in detail and with all its delights? Who would not be happy to live in such a world?" "I am much pleased with it from a distance, " I answered: "how it shall be later on, I cannot tell." "All will be well, believe me, " he replied: "but now let us go."

8 THE WAYS OF CHILDHOOD. "Wait, " Mr. Ubiquitous interposed, "let me show him from here what otherwise we do not intend to visit. Turn back toward the east: do you discern something crawling out of the dark gate and creeping toward us?" "Yes, I see it, " I replied. "Those are human beings, " he continued, "just entering the world. They themselves know not whence (for as yet they are not self-conscious) nor do they know themselves to be human. Hence, darkness envelopes them, and they merely wail and cry. But as they proceed up the street, the darkness slowly disappears and the light increases, until they reach the gate beneath us. Let us now go and see what transpires there."

Chapter 6

CHAPTER VI

FATE DISTRIBUTES CALLINGS

GATE, THE SENTINEL OF THE WORLD. We descended a dark, winding staircase and entered the gate in which a large hall was filled with young people. On the right sat a fierce-looking old man holding a large copper pot in his hand. I noticed that all who arrived from the Gate of Life presented themselves before him and each, putting his hand into the pot, drew out a piece of paper inscribed with a word. Thereupon, he went toward one of the streets, either running and joyfully shouting, or walking with a sorrowful mien, complaints, grimaces, and backward glances.

2 DISTRIBUTING OF OCCUPATIONS. I approached nearer and took a look at some of the slips. One read, Rule! ; another, Serve! ; or Command! ; or Obey! ; or Write! ; or Study! ; or Hoe! ; or Judge! ; or Fight! ; and so on. I was amazed at the scene. Mr. Searchall explained it by saying: "Here are distributed the callings and occupations in accordance with which each person is allotted his lifework. He who directs these lots is called Fate , and all who enter the world must receive his assignment."

3 THE PILGRIM WANTS FIRST TO EXAMINE ALL. Just then Mr. Delusion nudged me, indicating that I, too, should draw a lot. But I begged that I might not be assigned to any particular occupation (until I had first examined it) in order not to entrust my lot, come what may, to blind chance. I was told, however, that without the knowledge and consent of the lord regent, Fate, such an exception was not permitted. Stepping up to him, therefore, I humbly presented my petition: that I came with the intention of examining all things before I would make my choice of what would most appeal to me.

4 AND HE OBTAINED PERMISSION. "Son, " he answered, "you see that others do not do so, but abide by what they receive or what happens to fall to them. But since you desire it so much, I consent. " Having then inscribed on a slip of paper the word Speculare! (i.e., Examine or Investigate ), he handed it to me, thus dismissing me.

Chapter 7

CHAPTER VII

THE PILGRIM EXAMINES THE MARKET PLACE OF THE WORLD

HE SEES THE DIVERSITY OF MEN. Thereupon, my guide remarked: "Since you wish to investigate all things, let us begin by visiting the market place." He immediately led me there. And behold! such countless multitudes were gathered there that they seemed like a mist. People of all nations and languages of the world, of every age, stature, class, order, and profession, as well as both sexes, were gathered there. As I gazed at them, they were milling about hither and thither like bees at swarming time, or even more strangely.

2 THEIR CHARACTERS AND GESTURES. For some were wandering about, others were running or driving, or stood still, while another group was sitting or lying down. One group was rising while anothing was lying down, or was squirming about. Some were alone, others in large or small companies. Their costume and appearance also differed most widely: some indeed were stark naked, gesticulating queerly. When some of them met, they gestured with their hands, mouths, knees and otherwise, or huddled and cuddled....they cut all kinds of capers. "Here you see the noble human kind, those delightful, reasonable, and immortal creatures, bearing the image and likeness of immoral God, as may be learned from the great variey of their glorious deeds, " my companion declaimed: "here you may behold as in a mirror the dignity of your kind."

3 HYPOCRISY IN ALL OF THEM. I examined them more keenly, therefore, and observed, in the first place, that each one of those milling in the crowd wore a mask on his face, but when he was alone or with his equals, he took it off. However, as soon as he rejoined the crowd, he put it on again. I inquired what this meant. My guide answered: "That, my dear son, is human prudence, so as not to appear to everyone as one really is. Alone, one needs not constrain himself: but among people it befits one to appear decorously and to give a seemly appearance to one's affairs." I was seized by a desire to examine more diligently how these people appeared without artificial make-up.

4 THEIR DIVERSE DEFORMITIES. And watching them attentively, I saw that they were all variously disfigured, not merely in their features, but in their bodies as well. Most of them were pimply, scabby, or leprous. Besides, one had a swine lip, another dog's teeth, or ox horns, or ass ears, or basilisk eyes, or a fox tail, or wolf claws. Some, I observed, strutted about with a proudly erected peacock's neck, others with an erect lapwing crest, or with horse-hoofs, and so on. Most of them resembled monkeys. Horrified, I exclaimed: "But I see monsters here!" "Of what monsters are you babbling, you meddler?" remarked my interpreter, threatening me with his fist; "if only you look properly through your glasses, you will recognize them as human!" Moreover, some of the passers-by overheard my calling them monsters and stopped, threatening and reviling me. I realized that it was useless to argue. Therefore I remained silent, thinking to myself: if they wish to regard themselves as human, so be it. But I see what I see. Moreover, I was afraid lest my companion should readjust the glasses and thus delude. I decided, therefore, to be quiet and rather to concentrate on those fine things of which I had seen the beginning. I looked about me again and noticed that many people were dexterous in the manipulation of their masks, quickly snatching them off and donning them again, so that in an instant they could assume any appearance which befitted their need. Then I began to understand the course of the world. Nevertheless, I held my peace.

5 THEIR MUTUAL UNDERSTANDINGS. I also observed and heard that they spoke to each other in different languages. Consequently, for the greatest part they did not understand each other, and either did not answer or replied each one differently. In some places a large crowd gathered, all speaking at the same and each holding forth, none listening to the rest, although they tried to secure a hearing for themselves by pulling others toward them. Nevertheless, even so they failed, often bringing on fights and scuffles. "In God's name, is this the Tower of Babel?" I exclaimed: "everybody plays his own fiddle, could there be any greater confusion?"

6 PREOCCUPATION WITH USELESS MATTERS. There were among them but few idlers, for the majority occupied themselves with some work or other. Yet their occupations (and I should have never suspected) were but childish games, or at most drudgery. For some of them were gathering rubbish and distributing it among themselves; others were rolling timber and stones back and forth, or hoisting them on pulleys and lowering them again; others were digging in the ground, or conveying or carrying soil from place to place; the rest were working with bells, mirrors, bellows, rattles, and other trinkets. Some were even playing with their own shadow, measuring, chasing, or grasping at it. All this was done so assiduously that many sighed and perspired, while others fainted with fatigue. Moreover, there were officers stationed everywhere who directed and allotted the tasks with great zeal, while the workers obeyed with equal alacrity. Filled with astonishment, I exclaimed: "Alas! was then man made for wasting the keenness of his divinely-given talents upon such vain and petty toil?" "What is vain about it?" retorted my interpreter; "does it not appear as in a mirror how all problems are solved by human ingenuity? One engages in one thing, another in something else." "But all, " I said, "are busied with useless drudgery which is unworthy of their glorious eminence." "Do not play the wiseacre," he replied; "they are not in heaven yet, but are still on earth and must deal with earthly things. Observe, by the way, in what an orderly fashion everything is done."

7 TERRIBLE DISORDER. Again examining them, I noticed that nothing more disorderly could be invented. For while someone was staggering and stumbling under a load, another came and meddled with him; this led to brawls, fights, and scuffles. Then they became reconciled, only to tear each other soon afterwards. Sometimes several caught hold of the same thing; then they all dropped it and ran away, each in a different direction. Those who were subject to officers and overseers did what they were told willy-nilly, because they had to; but even there I saw much confusion. Some broke ranks and fled, while others grumbled at their foremen, refusing to do what they had ordered. Some snatched the overseers' cudgels from them and robbed thm. Hence, all was in a hubbub. But since they were wont to call it orderly, I dared not say them nay.

CHAPTER VIII

THE PILGRIM OBSERVES THE MARRIED ESTATE AND ITS ORDER

THE PREPARATION FOR IT IS TOILSOME AND WISTFUL. My companions then led me to a street where, they said, the married people lived, as a good demonstration of the mode of that delightful life. And behold! there stood a gate which, according to the guide, was called Engagement. Before it was spread a spacious square full of both sexes who were walking about and peering into each other's eyes and examining each other's ears, nose, teeth, tongue, hands, feet, and other limbs. They likewise measured how tall, broad, stout or slender each was. They approached or receded from one another, examining each other carefully now from the front, then the back, the left, the right side, testing all they saw. Especially were they curious (as I have seen most frequently) about each other's purses, money-bags, and pocketbooks, measuring and weighing how long and wide, full, tight, or thin they were. Occasionally several men pointed at the same woman, at other times none. If any man tried to drive the others away, they quarreled, exchanged blows, and fought with each other; sometimes even murders occurred, as I observed. At times one drove away his rival, only to be himself chased away in turn; another, routing a group of rivals, himself thereupon ran away also. Some lost no time in examining, but seized the nearest he could grasp. Thereupon, the couple led each other hand in hand toward the gate. Seeing such trivialities all about me, I inquired what those people were doing. "They would like to settle in the Street of Matrimony, " my interpreter answered, "but since choosing a mate most suitable to himself. Whoever has found his mate goes, as you see, with his spouse, to the gate." "The process seems unusually laborious, " I remarked; "can it not be facilitated somehow?" "This is no labor, " he answered, "but sheer delight. Do you not see how jolly they are about it, how they laugh, sing, and shout? Believe me, there is no more joyful life than this." I looked and observed that some indeed were laughing and shouting: but others went about with downcast mien and woebegone expression, restless and moping, plunging hither and yon, despondent, sleepless, without appetite, and even delirious. "How about these?" I inquired. "Even that is a delight," my interpreter answered. "So be it then, " I replied; "let us go and see what happens thereafter."

2 GREAT UNCERTAINTY ABOUT THE OUTCOME. Forcing our way through the crowds, we came to the gate itself, but before we entered, I noticed a pair of scales there, consisting of two baskets, and crowds of people stood about them. A man and a woman were placed opposite each other into the baskets on the scales. Only after the couples had spent much time weighing were they permitted to proceed through the gate. But not all fared equally well. For some fell through the basket, and amid much laughter, were obliged to pick themselves up and with shame to clear off. Besides, they had a hood or a sack thrust over their ears, and were made the butt of the crowd. Observing this, I inquired: "What is going on here?" My companion answered: "This is their engagement, when all conditions appear favorable. If the scales indicate equality and all seems favorable, they are admitted to the marriage state, as you see; but if there is an inequality, they separate." "What equality is to be seen here?" I exclaimed; "for I plainly perceive that some are, according to the scales, equal in age, class and otherwise, yet they cause one of them to fall through the basket; others are, on the contrary, extremely unequal, as when a dotard is mated with a lassie, or a lad with an old hag, one stands up straight, the other is bent double, yet they say that all is well. How can that be?" "You do not see all," he answered; "it is true that some of these grey-beards and grandames would not, by themselves, weigh a pound of peasecods; but when they possess a fat pocket-book, or a hat before which other hats are +6doffed, or something else of the kind (for such things always have their weight) it happens that matters do not...

INDISSOLUBILITY REGARDLESS OF THE OUTCOME. Following those who entered the gate, I then saw between the gates several blacksmiths fettering each couple into frightful handcuffs; only when thus bound together were they allowed to proceed further. Many people, invited for the purpose, were present as witnesses (as I was told) of the fettering ceremony. They played and sang for the couples and told them to be of good cheer. Observing carefully, I perceived that the cuffs were not padlocked as is ordinarily done with prisoners, but were forged, welded and soldered together to prevent the couple from ever unlocking or breaking them during their lifetimes. At this I was frightened and exclaimed: "Oh, can there be a more horrible prison than this, from which there is never a hope of deliverance?" "It is true that of all human bonds this is the strongest, " answered my interpreter; "but there is no reason to fear it. For the sweetness of this estate causes the yoke to be gladly assumed. You will see for yourself what a pleasant life it is." "Let us go among them, then, that I may see," I urged.

LITTLE PLEASURE EVEN MARRIAGE IS MOST SUCCESSFUL. Thereupon we entered the street and saw a great multitude of these people, always in pairs. However, many of them seemed to me to have been very unequally yoked, large with small, handsome with ugly, young with old, and so on. Watching them closely in order to find what they were doing and what the sweetness of that state consisted of, I observed that they gazed at each other, conversed together, and occasionally even caressed or kissed one another. "Here you see what a fine thing a successful marriage is, " remarked my interpreter. "Is this then the whole sum of it at its very best?" I asked. "Of course!" he answered. "That certainly is little enough; and whether or not it is worth the fetters, I know not."

5 MISERY AND DRUDGERY OF ALL MARRIED PEOPLE GENERALLY. Thereupon, I resumed my observation and perceived with how much toil and anxiety the poor wretches were burdened. The majority had a row of children harnessed to themselves. The children were screaming and squalling, stenching and fouling, sickening and dying, not to mention the pain, tears, and the risk of life with which they had been brought into the world. If any of them grew up, this imposed a twofold task: to hold him bridled, and to spur him on to follow his parents' footsteps. For sometimes they suffered neither the bridle nor the spur but caused their parents much trouble, weariness, and tears. When the parents gave them free rein, or the children tore themselves away, the result was shame and even death for the parents. Observing these things here and there, I began to exhort both parents and children: the former against mawkish love and excessive indulgence of their children; the latter to certain virtues. I gained but little thereby, except to earn dark looks and caustic remarks, and even to be threatened with death. Thereupon, I praised the childless, some of whom I noticed there; but they lamented and complained that they were without consolation. Thus I understood that in the married life both to have and not to have children is misery. Besides, almost every couple had servants attached to themselves and to the household for waiting upon them and their families, whose comfort the pair were obliged to consider before their own or that of their family, often at a considerable trouble to themselves. Above all, there was strewn about, just as in the market place, a great deal of baggage, timber, obstacles, boulders, and pits; when any stumbled and injured himself, his mate was obliged to endure his whimpering, weeping, and pain, not being able to get away. Accordingly, I learned that in married life instead of one care, anxiety, or danger each must bear as many cares, anxieties, and dangers as he had yoke-fellows. Consequently I conceived a dislike for this life.

6 THE AWFUL TRAGEDY OF AN UNSUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE. Besides, I observed some tragic cases in this group. For not a few among those yoked together were of contrary temperaments, one wished one thing, the other the opposite; one desiring to go one way, the other another; thereupon they quarreled, scolded, and bit each other. One complained to the passers-by of one thing, the other of another. When there was no one to arbitrate between them, they fell upon each other, lay about with fists, beat and belabored one another horribly. If someone succeeded in pacifying them, in a short time they were at each other's throats again. Sometimes, after a long quarrel, whether to go right or left, both persisting obstinately in their respective decisions, they finally threw themselves with all their might in opposite directions; here was a tug of war and a spectacle as to who would pull the other over! Sometimes the man won, and the wife, in spite of her efforts to hold on to soil, grass, or anything else she could grasp, was dragged over to his side. At other times the man was dragged after his wife, which caused much jeering among the spectators. However, it seemed to me a matter worthier of pity than of laughter. Especially when I saw how in their misery they wept, sighed, and stretched their hands toward heaven, offering gold and silver if only they might be delivered from their bondage. I asked the interpreter: "Is there any possibility of helping them? May not these people who cannot agree with each be freed and permitted to separate?" "It cannot be," he answered, "they must remain together as long as they live." "Oh, is there anything more cruel than this slavery? It is worse than death itself!" I exclaimed. "Why did not they think it through before?" he retorted; "it serves them right!"

VOLUNTARY SLAVERY. Just then I observed Death with her arrows piercing and felling some of them; whereupon their fetters instantly burst asunder. I was glad for their sake, imagining that they themselves had wished it and would be sincerely glad of their deliverance. But behold, almost every one of them burst into tears and wailing such as I had scarcely heard before in the world; they wrung their hands and lamented their misfortune. I could understand that those whom I had previously seen living together in peace really felt bereaved. I presumed, however, that the othersd were merely pretending before men, although in reality they would know how to repent, and I was ready to wager that they would advise others to avoid the fetters. On the contrary, before I had time to realize, and almost before they had dried their tears, they hurried outside the gate and came back in bonds. "Oh, you miserable wretches, you are not worthy to be pitied!" I cried angrily. Then turning to my guide, I said: "Let us go away; I see more deceit than anything else in this estate."

CHAPTER IX

THE PILGRIM EXAMINES THE LABOURING CLASS

WHAT HE SAW THERE GENERALLY. Proceeding, we entered the street inhabited by craftsmen, which was subdivided into many narrow alleys and smaller squares, and all about us we observed various halls, workshops, forges, benches, stores, and booths full of quaint-looking implements. Men plied these tools in a curious manner, with clattering, striking, squeaking, squealing, whistling, piping, blowing, blasting, jingling, and rattling. I saw some digging in the earth, either tearing up the surface of digging underneath like moles. Others were wading in water, rivers, or the sea; yet others were tending fires, gaping into the air, fighting wild beasts, dressing wood or stone, or carrying and hauling various commodities from place to place. My interpreter said to me: "Behold these brisk and cheerful occupations! Which of them do you like the best?" "There is doubtless some cheerfulness here, " I answered; "nevertheless, I also observe much drudgery and hear many groans along with it." "Not all work is so arduous, " he answered; "let us look closer and examine some these trades." So they led me through them one after another, and I scrutinized them all and tried my hand at one or another to test them; but to describe them all I am neither able nor willing. I shall not, however, keep secret what I concluded in general.

PERILOUS HASTE IN EVERY BUSINESS. In the first place, I saw that all these human ocupations were but toil and drudgery, and each had some disadvantages and dangers of its own. I saw that those who were working with fire were scorched and blackened like Moors: the clatter of hammers was ever jangling in their ears and had rendered them half-deaf; the glare of the fire had blinded their eyes; and their skin was perpetually singed. Those who were working underground had darkness and terrors for companions, and, as happened not infrequently, were liable to be buried alive. Those working in water were constantly soaked like roof-thatch, were shivering with cold like an aspen leaf, suffered from sclerosis of the viscera, and not a few of them fell a prey to the deep. Those who were working in wood, stone, and other heavy substances, were full of callouses, sighing, and exhaustion. Indeed, I saw some engaged in such asinine drudgery that they struggled and toiled to perspiration, exhaustion, collapse, injury, and finally to total breakdown; but despite all their miserable toil, they were hardly able to earn bread for themselves. Indeed, I observed others whose livelihoods were easier and more renumerative; but the less drudgery, the more vice and fraud there were.

ENDLESS HASTE. Secondly, I observed that men toiled only to feed their mouths; for whatever they earned, they crammed it all down their throats or the throats of their families, save in the rare cases when they stinted their mouths in order to put it into their bags. But, as I perceived, their bags were either torn, so that what they had put into them fell out again and others picked it up; or another came and snatched it out of their hands; or he himself, having tripped, dropped the bag or tore, or otherwise lost it. Thus I plainly saw that these human toils resembled water being poured from one glass into another; money was earned to be spent again, with the only difference that it was easier spent than earned, no matter whether it was crammed down the throat or hoarded in money coffers. Consequently, I sw everywhere many more poor than rich.

3 TOILSOME HASTE. Thirdly, I saw that every occupation required the whole man. If anyone but looked back or acted a little slowly, he was soon left behind and everything dropped from his hands. Hence, before he realized it, he found himself on the rocks.

DIFFICULT HASTE. In the fourth place, I observed many obstacles in the way. Before some one was started in business, a good portion of his life was gone; and after he was started, it did not look closely to his affairs, everything went against him; moreover, I noticed that even the most diligent among them met with loss as often as with profit.

HASTE PROVOKING ENVY. In the fifth place, I saw everywhere (especially among those engaged in the same kind of business) much envy and ill-will. If work piled up for one of them, or he enjoyed brisker trade than another, his neighbors gave him sour looks or gnashed their teeth at him, and whenever they could, wrecked his business: hence quarrels, disaffection, and cursing; some out of sheer despair threw away their tools and lapsed into idleness and voluntary poverty.

SINFUL HASTE. In the sixth place, I noticed everywhere much falsehood and fraud. Whatever anyone did, especially for a customer, was done shoddily and carelessly; yet he extolled and praised his own work to high heaven.

VAIN AND SUPERFLUOUS HASTE. In the seventh place, I found here a great deal of superfluity; and became firmly convinced that most of the occupations were but crass futility and useless folly. For the human body requires but frugal and plain food and drink, need be clothed with but plain and unostentatious garments; and be sheltered in a modest and simple house; but little and easily discharged care and labor are required, as was customary in ancient times. But I found that the world either could not or would not comprehend this simple truth, for now it is customary that stuffing and filling of the belly requires so many and such rare delicacies that the greater part of mankind is employed in their gathering on land and sea, and in this drudgery men waste their strength and hazard their lives; moreover, for the preparation of this food specially-trained masters must now be employed. Similarly, not a small part of humankind is engaged in building shelters and procuring materials for clothing and in tailoring them in various preposterous styles; all this is useless, superfluous, often even sinful. Likewise, I saw craftsmen whose entire art and occupation consisted of making childish trifles and other playthings, intended merely for amusement and the wasting of time. Others there were whose task was manufacturing and multiplyinge instruments of cruelty, such as swords, daggers, battle-maces, muskets, and so forth, all for the killing of men. How people can conscientiously and with a cheerful mind ply such trades I know not. But I know that if the useless, superfluous, and the sinful were excluded and eliminated from these trades, the greater part of the business of mankind would collapse. For this, as well as for the above-mentioned reasons, my mind could find no pleasure in any of them.

8 HASTE IS FOR BRUTES NOT MEN. My conclusion was strengthened when I saw that all these occupations were only of the body and for the body; while man, possessing a greater thing than the body--namely a soul--ought rather to bestow his principal care upon that and seek its well-being above all other +8things.

9 I wish to relate particularly how I fared among waggoners on land and sailors on the sea. For while I was examining the workshops and appeared discontented, Mr. Ubiquitous said to Mr. Delusion: "I notice that this fellow is or a roving disposition, a bit of quick silver, constantly desiring to be in motion: for he fancies nothing stable, not being willing to be tied to any one place. Let us show him a freer life: that of commerce in which he can roam at will from place to place and fly about like a bird." "I am not opposed to trying even that," I said. So we went.

HASTE OF A WAGGONER'S LIFE. Then I perceived a crowd of men rushing hither and thither, seeking and gathering all kinds of things such as splinters, soil, and manure, and hoisting and heaping them into loads. I inquired what they were doing. They replied: "They are getting ready to travel over the world." "But why not without the heavy load?" I asked; "they could drive more easily." "What a simpleton you are!" they retorted; "how could they drive? That is their wings." "Wings?" said I, "Of course, their wings! They provide resolution and incentive, and serve as passport and safe-conduct everywhere. Do you think that everybody is free to roam about the world at will? These people must secure their living, favor, and everything else from their occupation." So I looked; and behold they piled up as large a load as they could find, then slid and rolled it upon a kind of dolly on wheels, and tying it to the dolly, hitched some beasts to it and dragged the whole contraption laboriously and with great difficulty over hills, mountains, dales, and gullies, rejoicing in what they considered their excellent and cheerful life. At first it so appeared to me also. But when I observed how they occasionally got stuck in the mud and wallowed and waddled in it, pushing and pulling their loads, and perceived how much they endured from being exposed to rain, snow-storms, sleet, blizzards, frosts, and heat; and how they were waylaid at passes and robbed of their goods and purses (for on such occasions neither anger, swearing, nor threats were of any effect); finally when I saw how they were attacked on the roads by robber bands and how their very life was gravely jeopardized, I became disgusted with their occupation.

11 DISCOMFORT OF A SAILOR'S LIFE. Then my guides told me that they were was a more comfortable mode of travelling about the world, namely that of navigation; afloat, a man was not shaken so much, was not bespattered with mud, did not get stuck in a rut; moreover, he was shot from one end of the world to the other, everywhere finding something new, something he had not seen or heard of before. And they led me to the ends of the earth where nothing but sky and water stretched before us.

CHAPTER X

THE PILGRIM EXAMINES THE LEARNED CLASS GENERALLY

Thereupon my guide said to me: "At last I understand where your mind draws you: among the learned with you, among the learned; that is the bait for you, an easier, more peaceful, and for the mind a more useful life." "That is indeed so," said my interpreter; "for what can be more delightful for a man than to withdraw from, and to ignore unprofitable manual toil and give himself wholly to the investigation of all splendid causes? That is indeed what makes mortal men like, if not equal to, immortal God, so they may become as though omniscient, knowing and understanding what is, has been, or is to be in the heavens above, upon the earth, and in the abyss beneath; true, such perfection is not attained by all to an equal degree." "Lead me there, why do you tarry?" said I.

A RIGOROUS EXAMINATION TO START WITH. We then came to a gate called Discipline : it was long, narrow, and dark, full of armed guards, to whom every one desiring to enter the street of the learned had to report and request his guidance. I observed that the crowds of those who presented themselves, for the greates part young men, were immediately put through various severe examinations. The first of these, required of all, aimed at ascertaining what kind of purse, posterior, head, brain (which they judged by the nasal +11mucus), and skin each of the candidates brought. If the head were of steel, the brain of quicksilver, the posterior of lead, the skin of iron, and the purse of gold, they praised him and willingly conducted him farther; if he lacked any of these five prerequisites, they either ordered him back or admitted him grudgingly, foreboding ill success for him. I was amazed and inquired: "Does so much depend upon these five metals that they search for them so diligently?" "Very much, indeed," replied my interpreter; "the head that not of steel would crack: without the brain of quicksilver the pupil could not make a mirror of it; without the skin of sheet-iron he would not survive the formative process; not possessing the seat of lead, he would hatch nothing but miscarry everything; and without the purse of gold, where would he obtain the necessary leisure or teachers, both living and dead? Or do you imagine thatsuch great things may be obtained without cost?" Then only did I understand that this profession requires health, intelligence, perseverance, patience, and expenditure of money. "It may therefore be truly affirmed," I said, "non cuivis contingit adire +12Corinthum. Not every log is fit to serve for grained veneer."

TO ENTER IS PAINFUL AND DIFFICULT: MEMORIAL ARTIFICIALIS. We proceeded further into the gate where I observed that each guard, choosing one or more of the candidates, led them on, blew something into their ears, wiped their eyes, steamed their nose and nostrils, drew out and trimmed their tongue, taught them to clasp or extend their hands and fingers, and coached them in I do not know how many more ways. Some guards even attempted to bore their pupils' heads and to pour something into them. My interpreter, seeing frightened thereat, said "Be not amazed; the learned must possess hands, tongue, eyes, ears, brain, and all other external and internal organs of a different order from those of the ignorant masses of manking; for that purpose they are here reformed, and that cannot be accomplished without toil and pain." Then I looked and saw how deadly those poor wreteches had to pay for their re-formation. I do not speak of their purses, but of their skins which they had to expose. For they were beaten with fists, +13pointers, canes, and sticks on their cheeks, head, back, and seat until they shed blood, and were full of bruises and scars, weals and callouses. Some seeing this, before they surrendered themselves to the guards, cast but a hasty glance inside the gate and ran away: others tore themselves out of the hands of the would-be re-formers and likewise fled. Only a small remnant persevered to the end, to proceed further into the square; desirous of joining that profession, I too underwent the formation in a like manner, although not without hardships and +14bitterness.

EACH LEARNED MAN IS GIVEN A PASSWORD. When we left the gate, I noticed that each of those who had acquired something of the preliminary training, received a device by which he could be recognized as belonging to the scholars: an ink-horn stuck under his belt, a pen behind his ear, and a blank book for recording knowledge in his hand; I too received those articles. Mr. Searchall thereupon said to me: "We are now confronted with four paths: philosophy, medicine, law, and theology; where shall we go first?" "Do as you judge best," I replied. "Let us first go to the square where they all meet, " he suggested; "you will there see them all together, then let us visit their lecture rooms separately."

5 EVEN AMONG LEARNED MEN THERE ARE DEFICIENCIES. Thereupon, he led me to a square and behold! a crowd of students, masters, doctors, priests, both youths and grey-beards! Some were congregated in groups, conversing and disputing among themselves; others hugged out-of the-way nooks, away from all the rest. Some (as I clearly perceived, although I dared not speak of it) had eyes but no tongue; others had tongue but no eyes; some had only ears, but no tongue or eyes; and so forth; then I realized that deficiencies existed even here. Seeing that they all issued from a certain place and again re-entered it, like bees swarming in and out of a hive, I prompted my companions to go in as well.

6 DESCRIPTION OF A LIBRARY. So we entered; and behold, a large hall the end of which was out of sight; on all sides were ranged such long rows of shelves, sections, cases, and containers that a hundred thousand wagon loads could not remove them all, and each had its separate designation and title. "What kind of apothecary's shop have we come into, " I inquired. "One which deals in medicines for mind-diseases, " answered my interpreter: "such a place is properly called a libraray. Behold these endless stores of wisdom!" I looked around and watched groups of scholars approaching and handling the equipment. Some selected the best and wittiest, and drawing out a piece, ate it, slowly chewing and digesting it. I went up to one of them and asked him what he was doing. "I am cultivating myself." "And how does the food taste?" "While I am chewing it, " he replied, "it tastes bitter and acrid; but later it turns sweet." "But why are you eating it?" I continued. "I find it more convenient to carry it within, " he answered; " for I am then surer of it. Do you not observe the benefit?" I scrutinized him more carefully and saw that he was stout and fat, with a healthy complexion; his eyes shone like candles, his diction was carefully chosen, and everything about him had an air of livelines. "Look at these!" my interpreter told me.

7 THE EVILS OF STUDIES. I looked and behold! some men behaving very greedily, glutting themselves with anything they could lay their hands on. Observing them more carefully, I noticed that they neither improved their complexion nor gained flesh or fat, save that their belly was blown and swelled out; I also perceived that whatever they crammed in, passed out at both ends undigested. Some of them became dizzy or lost their minds; others grew pallid, pined away, and died. Others seeing this, singled out these men as a warning against the dangers in the use of books (as they called the boxes); thereupon, some ran away; others exhorted all to deal carefully with those things. Hence, these latter did not consume them inwardly, but packed them into sacks or bags which they kept suspended before or behind their persons (for the greatest part, they selected the following titles: the Vocabulary, the Dictionary, the Lexicon, Illustrations, Quotations, Loci communes , Postils, Concordances, Herbaria, and such others as they deemed the most appropriate to their needs ) and these they carried about, and whenever they had occasion to speak or write, they drew them out of their pockets and culled out whatever was needed for their tongue or pen. Perceiving this, I said: "I notice that these people carry their knowledge in their pockets." "Those are merely aids to memory, " my interpreter answered; "have you not heard of them?" I have, indeed, heard some praise this custom on the ground that such men brought out only generally approved knowledge. That might very well have been the case. I observed, however, that the custom had this disadvantage. It happened in my presence that some misplaces boxes, while others, having laid them aside, lost them in fire. What running about, wringing of hands, lamenting, and imploring of aid then ensued! For the time being nobody was willing to dispute, or write, or preach; but walking about with downcast eyes, cringing and blushing, he begged or purchased from his acquintances a new outfit; those, however, who had inner store of knowledge, were not afraid of such a mishap.

8 STUDENT WHO DOES NOT STUDY. Moreover, I observed certain of them who did not even trouble themselves to carry the boxes in their pockets, but stored them in their rooms; I followed them and saw that they made beautiful receptacles for the books, painting them various colors, some daubing them with silver and gold; then they placed the books on or took them off the shelves, pleased with looking at them; they continued putting up and taking down the books, approaching or retreating, pointing out to each other or to strangers the excellent appearance of them, all superficially. Some occasionally looked at the titles to memorize the names of the works. "What are these folk playing?" I inquired. "My dear fellow," replied the interpreter, "it is a fine thing to possess a fine library." "Even when it is not used?" I remarked. "Lovers of books are also counted among the learned, " he rejoined. I thought to myself: just as well might a man be counted among blacksmiths if he possessed a heap of hammers and pincers, but did not know how to use them! Nevertheless, I forebore to speak for fear of catching something.

CHAPTER XI

THE PILGRIM CAME AMONG THE PHILOSOPHERS

Then my interpreter addressed me: "Now I shall lead you among the philosophers whose task it is to discover the means of correcting all human deficiencies and to show the essence of true wisdom." "God grant that I shall at last learn something certain," said I. "Of course you will, " he replied; "for these are men who know the truth of everything, without whose knowledge neither heaven manifests itself nor does the abyss hide anything; they guide human life nobly to virtue, enlighten communities and countries, and have God for their friend; for their wisdom penetrates His secrets." "Let us hurry, please, " I urged; "let us go among them as quickly as possible. " But when he brought me among these men, and I saw a crowd of these oldsters with their strange antics, I stood as if petrified. For there Bion sat still, Anacharsis strolled about, Thales flew, Hesiod plowed, Plato chased ideas in the air, Homer sand, Aristotle disputed, Pythagoras kept still, Epimenides slept, Archimedes tried to push the earth away, Solon was composing laws and Galen prescriptions, Euclid was measuring the hall, Cleobulus was peering into the future, Periander was defining duties, Pittacus was waging war, Bias was begging, Epictetus was serving, Seneca, sitting among tons of gold, was extolling poverty, Socrates was confiding to everybody that he knew nothing, Xenophon, on the contrary, was promising to teach everything to everybody, Diogenes, peering out of his barrel, was deriding all passersby, Timon was cursing all, Democritus was laughig at it all, Heraclitus, on the contrary, was weeping, Zeno was fasting, Epicurus was feasting, while Anaxarchus was holding forth that all these things were only apparent, not real. Moreover, there was a flock of smaller philosophical fry, each of whom was doing something extraordinary; but I neither remember nor care to recount it +29all. Observing it all, I said: "Are these, then, the wise men, the light of the world? Alas! Alas! I had hoped for better things! For these act like peasants in a tavern: they all howl, and each to a different tune." "You are a dunce," my interpreter retorted, "you dod not understand such mysteries." Hearing that there were mysteries, I began to scrutinize the crowd meticulously, while my interpreter began to explain them to me. Straightway a man (called Paul of Tarsus) in a philosopher's garb, approached me and whispered into my ear: "If any man among you thinks he is wise in this world, let him become a fool that he may be wise. For the wisdom of the world is but foolishness with God. For it is written: The Lord knows the thoughts of the wise that they are +30futile." Perceiving that what my eyes have seen and my ears have heard agreed with this speech, I willingly acquiesced and said: "Let us go elsewhere." My interpreter scolded me for being such a fool, saying that when I might learn something among the wise, I ran away from them. But I pressed on in silence.

2 HE CAME AMONG THE GRAMMARIANS. We then entered a lecture room full of young and old, who, with pointers in their hands, were engaged in drawing letters, dashes, and +31dots; whenever any of them wrote or pronounced his formula differently from the rest, they either ridiculed or scolded him. Moreover, they hung some words on the wall and disputed as to what belonged to which; then they composed, separated, or transposed them variously. I looked at this for a while, but seeing nothing in it, I said: "These are but childish trivialities. Let us go elsewhere."

3 AMONG THE RHETORICIANS. Thereupon we entered another hall where many were gathered with brushes in their hands, discussing how words, either written or escaping from the mouth into the air, could be painted green, red, black, white, or any other color +32desired. I inquired what the purpose of this procedure. "This is done in order that the hearers' brain may be colored in different ways," my interpreter replied. "Are these disguises intended to bring out truth or falsehood?" I continued. "Either one, " he answered. "Then there is as much fraud and falsehood as truth and benefit in it," I remarked, and went out.

4 AMONG THE POETS. We then entered another place; and behold! a crowd of spry-looking adolescents weighing syllables in scales and arranging them in [metrical] feet, meanwhile rejoicing over their work and skipping +33about. I was amazed and inquired what it all meant. "Of all literary arts, " my interpreter explained, "this one is the most skillful and gay." "But what is it ?" I inquired. "Whatever cannot be managed by simple coloring of the words, " he answered, "is accomplished by this folding process." Noticing that those who were learning this art of word-folding consulted certain books, I also glanced into them and read their titles: De Culice, De Passere, De Lesbia, De Priapo, De arte amandi, Metamorphoses, Encomia, Satirae , or in a word, farces, poems, comedies, and all kinds of other +34frivolities. This made me somehow loathe the whole +35thing. Especially when I perceived that whenever anyone flattered those syllable-mongers, they expended all their art on his adulation; but whenever anyone displeased them, they showered him with sarcasms. Thus the art was used for nothing but flattery or defamation. Discerning what passionate folk they were, I gladly hurried away from them.

5 AMONG THE DIALECTICIANS. Entering another building, we found that lenses for glasses were ground and sold +36there. I inquired what they were. Notiones secundae, they told me. Whoever possessed them could see not only the exterior of things, but to their very core; especially could one look into another's brain, and scrutinize his mind. Many people came to buy these glasses, and the masters taught them how to put them on and, if need be, to readjust them. There were special master glass-grinders who had their workshops in obscure nooks; but they did not make the glasses identical. One made them lage, another small; one round, another polygonal. Each praised his own wares and tried to attract buyers, while among themselves they quarreled perpetually and heckled each other. Some buyers purchased glasses from each of the makers, and put them all on; others selected and used only one pair. Thereupon some complained that even so they could not penetrate as deeply as they had been told, while others claimed that they could, and pointed to each other beyond the mind and all reason. But I noticed that not a few of these latter, venturing to step out, stumbled over boulders and stumps and fell into ditches, of which, as I had remarked before, the place was full. "How does it happen, " I asked, "that although everything may be seen through the glasses, these people do not avoid the obstacles?" I was told that it was not the fault of the glasses, but of the people who did not know who to use them. The masters added, moreover, that it was not sufficient to possess the glasses of dialectic, but that the eyes must be cleared with the bright eye-salve of physics and mathematics. Therefore, they advised the buyers to repair to the other halls and to have their eyesight improved. Accordingly, they went, one here, another there. Thereupon, I said to my guides: "Let us follow as well." We did not go, however, until at the prompting of Mr. Searchall I had procured and put on several pairs of these glasses. It is true that I seemed able to discern somewhat more than before, and that a particular thing could be seen from several points of view. But still I insisted that we proceed to the place where I could try the eye-salve of which they had spoken.

6 AMONG THE NATURAL SCIENTISTS. So we went, and they led me to a certain square in the center of which I saw a large, wide-spreading tree bearing diversely-shaped leaves and various fruit (all in hard shells); they called it Nature. A large number of philosophers had gathered around, examining it and explaining to each other what the name of each branch, leaf, or fruit was. "These, I hear, are learning the names of these things, " I said, "but I do not perceive that they apprehend their real being." "Not every one is able to do that, " my interpreter anwered; "nevertheless, watch these men here. " I saw some of them break off the branches and open the leaves and the shell, and finding the nut, cracking it with such a force that they well-nigh broke their teeth: but they claimed to have broken the shells; then picking over the crushed mass, they boasted to have discovered the kernel, and surreptitiously showed it to a select few among the company. But when I diligently scrutinized the procedure, I perceived plainly that although they had indeed broken the outer husk and the integuement, the inner hard shell, containing the kernel, remained whole. Being thus aware of their immodest boasts and futile toil (for some of them had lost their sight and broken their teeth) I suggested that we go elsewhere.

7 AMONG THE METAPHYSICIANS. Thereupon, we entered another hall; and lo! it was full of philosophical gentlemen who were examining cows, asses, wolves, serpents, and various other beasts, birds, reptiles, as well as wood, stone, water, fire, clouds, stars, planets, and indeed even the angels; thereupon, they held disputations among themselves as to how each creature could be deprived of its distinctive characteristics so that all might become +37alike. They first divested them of their form, then of their substance, and finally of all their "accidents", until nothing but the "being" remained. Then they quarreled whether all these things were one and the same; or whether they were all good; or whether they really were what they appeared to be; and about many other similar questions. Some of those observing them expressed their amazement at the surpassing keenness of the human wit that was able to fathom the essence of all things and to divest all corporeal beings of their corporeality; indeed, I myself began to be fascinated by these subtleties. Just then, however, a man stepped out, crying that all these studies were but fantasies, and exhorted all to abandon +38them. Thereupon, some were indeed drawn after him. But others rose up and condemned them as heretics, accusing them of wishing to deprive philosophy of its highest art and, as it were, of decapitating knowledge. Having listened sufficiently to these wranglings, I went away.

CHAPTER XII

THE PILGRIM EXAMINES ALCHEMY

Thereupon, Mr. Ubiquitous remarked: "Now come along, for I shall take you to a place where you will find the highest peak of human ingenuity, and show you an occupation so delightful that anyone who has once turned to it is never again willing to abandon it as long as he lives, because of the charm and delight which it affords his mind." I begged him not to delay in showing me. Thereupon he led me down into some cellars where I saw several rows of fireplaces, small ovens, kettles, and glass instruments, all shining brightly. Men tending the fires were gathering and piling on brushwood and blowing into it, or again extinguishing it, filling and pouring something from one glass into another. "Who are these folk, and what are they doing?" I asked. "They are the most ingenious of philosophers," my interperter answered, "effecting instantly what the celestial sun with its heat can effect in the bowels of the earth only after a considerable number of years: they transform various metals into their highest category, namely, gold." "But for what purpose, " I asked, "since iron and other metals are of more frequent use than gold?" "What a dunce you are!" he exclaimed, "don't you know that gold is the most precious of metals, and that he who has gold need fear no poverty?

2 LAPIS PHILOSOPHICUS*. "Besides, that which has the potency to change metals into gold possesses other most astounding properties: for instance, it can preserve human health to the end of life, and ward off death for two or three hundred years. In fact, if men knew how to use it, they could make themselves immortal. For this stone is nothing less than the seed of life, the kernel and the quintessence of the universe, from which all animals, plants, metals, and the very elements derive their being." I was affrighted, hearing such astounding news, and asked: "Are these people, then, immortal?" "Not all are so fortunate as to discover the stone, " he answered, "and those who find it do not alwasys know how to use it effectively." "If I had the stone, " I remarked, "I would take care to use it in such a way as to keep death away, and would procure plenty of gold for myself and others. But where is the stone to be found?" "It is prepared here, " he answered. "In these small kettles?" I exclaimed. "Yes."

3 THE MISHAPS OF THE ALCHEMISTS. Full of curiosity, I walked about scrutinizing everything to learn what and how the thing was done; but I observed that not all fared equally. The fire of one was not hot enough: his mixture did not reach the boiling point. Another had too intense a fire, and his glass retorts cracked and something puffed out. As he explained it, the nitrogen had escaped; and he wept. Another, while pouring the liquid, spilled it or mixed it wrongly. Another burned his eyes out, and was thus unable to supervise the calcination and the fixation: or bleared his sight with smoke to such an extent that before he cleared his eyes the nitrogen escaped. Some died of asphyxiation from the smoke. But for the greatest part they did not have enough coal in their bags and were obliged to run about to borrow it elsewhere, while in the meantime their concoction cooled off and was utterly ruined. This was of very frequent, in fact of almost constant, occurrence. Although they did not tolerate anyone among themselves save such as possessed full bags, yet these seemed to have a way of drying up very rapidly, and soon grew empty: they were obliged either to suspend their operations or to run away to borrow.

4 After watching them, I said: "I see a good many here toil vain; but perceive none who succeeds in getting the stone. I also see that these people boil and burn both their gold and their lives, and often squander and burn both; but where are those with the heaps of gold and immortality?" "Naturally, they do not reveal themselves to you, " my interpreter answered, "nor would I advise them so to do. Such a priceless thing must be kept secret. For if one of the rulers learned of such a man, he would immediately demand his surrender and the poor fellow would become no better than a prisoner for life; consequently, them must keep themselves in hiding."

5 Then I observed some of the scorched ones gather together, and turning my ear toward them, I heard them discuss the causes of their failures. One blamed the philosophers for their too involved description of the art; another lamented the brittleness of the glass implements; a third complained of an untimely and inauspicious aspect of the planets; a fourth was disgruntled with the earthly impurities of the mercury; a fifth complained of lack of capital. In short, there were so many causes of failure that I saw that they were at a loss to know how to mend their art. Thus when they left one after another, I left also.

CHAPTER XIII

THE PILGRIM OBSERVES THE ROSICRUCIANS

FAMA FRATERNITATIS, ANNO 1612 LATINE AC GERMANICE EDITA*. Then I heard in the square the blare of a trumpet, and turning back I perceived a rider on horseback, calling the philosophers together. When a crowd of them gathered about him from all sides, he began to harangue them in five languages about the imperfections of the liberal arts and of philosophy generally. He announced that certain famous men, impelled by God, had ascertained and corrected all such imperfections, and restored the wisdom of mankind to the same degree of perfection which it had had in paradise before the Fall. To make gold, he said, is the least among hundreds of their accomplishments: for all nature stands naked and uncovered before them and they are able to transfer at pleasure the form of any creature to another. They know the languages of all nations, and are aware of all that is taking place everywhere in the world, including the New World, and are able to discourse among themselves even though they be thousands of miles apart. They also possess the [philosophers'] stone, with which they are able to heal perfectly all kinds of diseases, and to impart long life. Thus, for example, their president, Hugo Alverda, had attained the age of five hundred and sixty-two years, and his colleagues not much less. And although they have kept themselves hidden for so many hundreds of years, during which time seven of them devoted themselves to the improvement of philosophy, they have now, at last, brought it all to perfection. Moreover, knowing that the reformation of the whole world is about to begin, they wish no longer to keep themselves in hiding, but announce quickly their willingness to share their priceless secrets with anyone whom they should recognize as being worthy. If any such makes himself known to them, be he of whatever language or nationality, they will learn of it, and no one will be left without a kindly answer. However, if any unworthy person should apply from motives of avarice or idle curiosity, such a person will not be able to learn anything about them.

2 VARIA DE FAMA* JUDICIA. Having finished his speech, the herald disappeared; looking about me at the learned, I saw them well-nigh terrified by the news. Gradually they began to put their heads together and to express their judgement about the matter, some in whispers, others aloud. Joining a group here and there, I listened: some were exceedingly glad, hardly knowing how to contain themselves for joy. They pitied their ancestors whose age had afforded them nothing comparable, and considered themselves blessed to be so freely offered a perfect philosophy: to know everything infallibly, to possess everything in abundance, and to live several hundred years without sickness or grey hairs--all to be had by anyone desiring it! They kept on repeating: "Happy, thrice happy, is our age!" Hearing thees words, I myself began to rejoice, indulging in the hope of sharing, God willing, the blessings upon which the others were counting. But I saw others buried in deep thought, greatly perplexed what to think of the news. They wished it were true, but the matter appeared to them dubious and surpassing human reason. Others openly rejected it, declaring it to be a fraud and a deceit. "If these men have lived for so many centuries, " they said, "why have they not revealed themselves sooner? If they are so sure of their cause, why do they not step out freely into the light, instead of squeaking like bats out of some obscure nook? Philosophy is well enough established and needs no reformation; should we allow it to be snatched out of our hands, we shall be left without any." Others even heaped terrible scoffing and abuse upon them, denouncing them as diviners, sorcerers, and demons incarnate.

3 FRATERNITATEM AMBIENTES**. In short, the whole square was filled with clamor, and almost all burned with the desire to reach the fraternity. Therefore, not a few of them wrote their supplications, some secretly, others openly, and sent them off, full of joy in anticipation of being received into the fraternity. But I perceived that after the supplications had gone to every conceivable nook, all were returned unanswered. Then their joyful hope was turned into grief: besides, they had to endure jeers of the sceptics. Some wrote another petition, and then a second, a third or even more, begging and imploring, in the name of all the Muses and in the most affecting manner, that the fraternity decline not a mind a thirst for knowledge. Some, impatient of delay, personally undertook the journey from one end of the world to the other, but lamented their misfortune in not being able to find those happy folk. Some ascribed the reason for their failure to their own unworthiness, others to the ill-will of the fraternity. Consequently, some fell into despair, while others tortured themselves by persisting in their endeavo to discover ever new ways of ascertaining the group's whereabouts, until I myself grew weary of waiting for the final outcome.

4 CONTINUATIO Then a trumpet blared again: when many ran out to find out what the sound imported, I joined them also. I saw a m an setting up a booth, inviting the bystanders to examine and to buy his most wonderful mysteries; he claimed to have taken them from the treasures of the new philosophy, and assured all desirous of the secert wisdom would find satisfaction therein. Then many rejoiced that the holy Brotherhood of the Rose had openly and liberally shared its treasures and approaching, bought the wares. All articles put up for sale were enclosed in painted boxes, bearing attractive inscriptions such as: Good Guide to the Large and the Small Cosmos; A Harmony of the Two Worlds; The Christian Cabala; The Case of Nature; The Castle of Primordial Matter; The Divin Magic; The General Tri-Trinity; The Triumphal Pyramid; Hallelujah; and so forth. But the buyers were forbidden to open the boxes. For the efficacy of the secret wisdom was said to be so powerful that it operated by penetration, and would evaporate if the box were opened. Nevertheless, some of the more inquisitive could not refrain from opening their boxes and found them entirely empty! Thereupon, they showed them to others, who also opened their boxes and likewise found nothing. Then they raised a cry of "Fraud! Fraud!" and assaulted the dealer with fury. He attempted to pacify them by saying that the most secret part of the mystery consisted in the fact that these things were invisible to all save the sons of science; and since barely one out of a thousand possessed the proper qualifications, he, the dealer, was not to blame for it.

5 EVENTUS FAMAE. The buyers for the greatest part were pacified thereby; in the meantime the dealer packed up his wares, while the spectators dispersed in very different humors, one here, another there. But whether or not anyone had discovered the new mysteries, I have hitherto been unable to learn. This only I know that thereafter everything quieted down and those who had been formerly running and rushing about the most, were found sitting in obscure corners with their mouths shut. Either they had been (as some thought) admitted to the mysteries upon an oath that theyleep them secret; or (as it appeared to me observing them from under my glasses) were ashamed of their blasted hopes and misspent effort. Thus everything passed and quieted down as clouds disperse after a rainless storm. I said to my companions: "Are all these things, then, an utter failure? Oh, my disappointed hopes! Hearing such boastful promises, I expected to find a profitable pasture for my mind." My interpreter answered: "Who knows but it might yet materialize? Perhaps they know their hoiur when and to whom to reveal themselves." "Should I wai for such an event, when I have not seen a single instance of success among so many thousands of men more learned than I am? I do not care to gape any longer: let us go away," I said.

CHAPTER XIV

THE PILGRIM EXAMINES THE MEDICAL PROFESSION

ANATOMY. Having been conducted through some alleys between the physics and the chemistry lecture rooms into another square, I beheld a gruesome sight. There men stretched out a corpse before them and cutting off one limb after another, examined the viscera, with keen relish exhibiting to each other what they +50found. "What cruelty to deal with a human being as if he were a beast!" I exclaimed. "It must be done; this is their school, " my interpreter replied.

2 BOTANY. Thereupon, abandoning that task and dispersing into gardens, meadows, fields, and mountains, they plucked whatever they found growing there and piled it into such heaps that many years would scarcely suffice for its mere sorting and scanning. Then each snatched from the heap what he saw fit or happened to lay his hand on and running to the ripped-up body, measured it with the limbs as to their length, width, and thickness. One said that it fitted; another denied it. Then they shouted at each other in dispute; they had great controversies about the very names of the herbs. He who knew the greatest number of them and how to measure and weight them, was crowned with a wreath of those herbs, and was to be called the doctor of the art.

3 PRAXIS MEDENDI. Then I saw a number of wounded, both externally and internally, with putrid and rotting limbs, brought or conducted to the physicians; they approached them, examined the putrifications, smelling the stench emitted from them, and scrutinized the evacuations proceeding from both above and below, until the sight was disgusting; this they called diagnosis. Then they cooked, steamed, roasted, broiled, cauterized, cooled, burned, hacked, sawed, stabbed, sewed again, bound, annointed, hardened, softened, wrapped, or moistened, and I know not what more they did in oder to effect the cure. In the meantime, their patients had been expiring under their hands, not a few of them lamenting the doctors' ignorance or carelessness as the causes of their death. In a word, I saw that although the art of these fine salve-mongers brought them a certain gain, it also involved them, on the other hand (if they wished to do justice to their calling), in a great deal of very strenuous and partly even disgusting labor, and in the end brought them as much blame as praise. This made it distasteful to me.

CHAPTER XV

THE PILGRIM OBSERVES THE LEGAL PROFESSION

FINIS JURIS. In the last place, they led me into still another very spacious lecture room where I saw a greater number of distinguished men than anywhere else. The walls around were painted with stone walls, barriers, picket-fences, plank-fences, bars, rails, and gate staves, interspersed at various intervals by gaps and holes, doors and gates, bolts and locks, and along with it larger and smaller keys and hooks. All this they pointed out to each other, measuring where and how one might or might not pass through. "What are these people doing?" I inquired. I was told that they were searching for means how every man in the world might hold his own or might also peacefully obtain something from another's property without disturbing order and concord. "That is a fine thing!" I remarked. But observing it a while, it grew disgusting to me.

2 JUS CIRCA QUID VESETUR. For, in the first place, I noticed that the barriers enclosed neither the soul, the mind, nor the body of man, but solely his property, which is of incidental importance to him; and it did not seem to me worthy of the extremely difficult toil that was, as I saw, expended upon it.

3 FUNDAMENTUM JURIS. Besides, I observed that all this science was founded upon the mere whim of a few men to whom one or another thing seemed worthy of being enjoined as a statute and which the others now obsesrved. Moreover (as I noticed here), some erected or demolished the bars or gaps as the notion entered their heads. Consequently, there was much outright contradiction in it all, the rectification of which caused a group of them a great deal of curious and ingenious labor; I was amazed that the;y sweated and toiled so much upon most insignificant minutiae, amounting to very little, and occurring scarcely once in a millenium; and all with not a little pride. For the more a man broke through some bar or made an opening that he was able to wall up again, the better he thought of himself and the more was he envied by others. But some (in order to show the keenness of their wit) rose up and opposed him, contending that the bars should be set up or the gaps broken thus so. Hence arose contentions and quarrels, until finally separating, they painted each his case in his own way, at the same time attracting spectators to themselves. Observing this tomfoolery sufficiently, I shook my head, exclaiming: "Let us hurry away! I feel distressed here!" "Is there anything in the world to your liking?" my interpreter angrily retorted. "You find fault even with the noblest of callings, you weathercock!" "It seems that he is religious-minded; let us take him to see the clerical professions; perhaps he will find it to his liking, " Mr. Ubiquitous suggested.

CHAPTER XVI

THE PILGRIM OBSERVES THE PROMOTION OF MASTERS AND DOCTORS

But behold! a trumpet sounded as if summoning the people for a celebration; Mr. Searchall, divining what was to happen, suggested: "Let us return for a moment; there will be something worth seeing." "What will it be?" I inquired. He answered: "The Academy is going to crown those who, having exercised superior diligence, have attained the summit of learning; these, I say, are to be crowned as an example to all others." Desirous to see such a rare spectacle, and seeing the multitudes rushing thither, I followed after the crowd; here, under the "philosophical +51sky, " stood a personage holding a paper sceptre, to whom some from among the crowd presented themselves, requesting an attestation of their high learning. He approved their request as proper and commanded them to present in writing what they knew and to which they desired certification. Thereupon one expounded a summary of philosophy; another , of medicine; another, of law; but at the same time, in order to make the progress smoother, they greased the way with their purses.

2 The personage then, taking the candidates ones by one, pasted a title on their foreheads: this is a Master of Liberal Arts; this is a Doctor of Medicine; this is a Licentiate of Both Laws, +52etc. Then he confirmed these titles with his seal, and commanded all, whether present or absent, on pain of the disfavor of the goddess Pallas Athene, not to address them otherwise, when they met them, except by those titles. Therewith he dismissed both them and the multitude. "Is there something more to follow?" I asked. "Isn't that enough for you?" retorted my interpreter. "Don't you see how everybody gives way before them?" And indeed, they did give way.

3 However, wishing to learn how they fared afterwards, I observe one of those masters of arts: they asked him to figure out something, he could not; to measure something, he could not; to name the stars, he could not; to make syllogisms, he could not; to speak in foreign languages, he could not; to deliver an oration in his own tongue, he could not; at last they bade him read and write, but he could not. "What a shame, " I exclaimed, "to subscribe oneself a master of the seven arts but to know none of them!" "If this one does not know them, " my interpreter answered, "another or a third or fourth does; all cannot be equally proficient." "Do I understand, then, " I replied, "that after one has spent his youth and his substance in schools, after he has been loaded with titles and seals, it is necessary to ask whether he has learned anything? May God save us from such a pass!" "You will never cease playing the wiseacre, " he retorted, "until you catch something! Just keep on babbling like that, and I swear that you will surely suffer for it. " "Well, then, " I replied, "even if they be masters or doctos of seventy-seven arts, and know them all or none, I will not say a word; only let us go away."

CHAPTER XVII

THE PILGRIM EXAMINES THE RELIGIOUS PROFESSION

THE PAGANS. Thereupon they led me through some passages from which we emerged upon a square full of churches and chapels of different architectures. Multitudes kept going in and out of them. We stepped into the nearest and lo! there were pictures and statues of men and women on all sides, as well as of all kinds of animals, birds, reptiles, tress, and plants; likewise of the sun, the moon, the stars, and of many ugly demons. Each of those entering this place chose whatever pleased him best and kneeling before it, kissed it, burning incense or a sacrifice before it. I was amazed at the concord among them, for in spite of the ritual differences, they tolerated them all, and peacefully allowed everyone to keep his own opinion (a practice I have not since seen elsewhere); being assailed by an overpowering stench, I was seized with terror; so I soon hastened out.

2 THE JEWS. We then entered another temple, white and clean, containing nothing but living images; these, wagging their heads, mumbled something in a low voice; or arising and stopping up their ears, they opened their mouths wide and gave out sounds not unlike those of howling wolves. TALMUDI FIGMENTA*. Then they gathered themselves together to examine certain books; approaching closer, I saw in them bizarre illustrations. For instance, feathered and winged beasts and wingless birds; beasts with human and men with beastlike limbs; one body with many heads and one head with many bodies; some of these monsters had a head in place of the tail and a tail in place of the head; some had eyes on the belly and feet on their backs: some had ears, mouths, and feet without number, while others had none. Everything was strangely transposed, twisted, inverted, and perverted, as well as greatly out of proportion: one limb was a foot long, another a rod in length; one was a finger's width, another a barrel's; in a word, all was monstrous beyond belief. But they, claiming all this to be historically correct, praised it as excellent, and the older exhibited it to the young as a mystery. "Who would have imagined that there would exist folk who actually relish such unappetizing things, " I remarked. "Let us go elsewhere, leaving them alone." We went out, and I noticed these people mingling with the rest; however, they were disliked by all others and were the target of their jests and pranks. This inclined me to disdain them.

3 THE MOSLEMS. We then entered another temple, which was round, and although not inferior in beauty to the former, was without any ornaments; save some lettering on the walls and carpets on the floor. The worshippers, all clad in white, behaved quietly and reverently, they were great lovers of cleanliness and were constantly performing ablutions, and distributing alms, so on account of their external appearance I began to feel favorably inclined toward them. "What is the foundation of their belief?" I inquired. "They carry it hidden under their robes," Mr. Searchall answered. I approached closer and begged to see it. But they replied that it was not proper for anyone but their interpreters to examine it. I persisted in my request, adducing the permission of the Lord Fate in my behalf.

4 A SUMMARY OF THE KORAN. Finally they took out and showed me a chart upon which a tree was depicted with its roots up in the air and its branches stuck in the ground; many moles, supervised by a large mole who was running about, calling the others and assigning them their several tasks, were busy digging around this tree. They told me that the branches of the tree underground bore all kinds of delicious fruit which the silent and industrious little creatures brought to light. "And that is, " explained Mr. Searchall, "the sum of their religion." I understood therefrom that its foundation rests upon the wind of supposition and its goal and fruit consist in burrowing in the ground and rejoicing over invisible delights which do not exist, and seeking blindly they know not what.

5 MUHAMMEDANISM IS FOUNDED ON FORCE. Leaving the place, I remarked to my guide: "How do they prove that this really is a reliable and true foundation of religion?" "Come and see!" he replied. We passed behind the temple into a square where we saw those white-clad and well-washed folk rolling up their sleeves and with fire in their eyes, biting their lips and roaring terribly, rushing about and putting to the sword anyone whom they encountered as they waded in human blood. I was terrified and ran back, exclaiming: "What are they doing?" "They are disputing about religion and proving that the Koran is true, " they answered me

6 PERSIANS AND TURKS QUARREL ABOUT THE KORAN. We re-entered the temple and there witnesses a controversy among those who carried the chart concerning, as I understood, the chief mole. One party claimed that he alone was directing those smaller moles, while the other party contended that he had two helpers. This question involved them in such an interminable struggle that in the end they fought with sword and fire both among themselves and with those outside, until it was terrible to behold.

CHAPTER XVIII

HE EXAMINES THE CHRISTIAN RELIGION

Seeing my fright, my guide said to me: "Let us go then. I will show you the Christian religion, which, being founded upon reliable divine relevations, beautifully agrees with itself and benefits both the simplest and the most learned. It exhibits clearly and lucidly the heavenly truth and refutes all opposing erroneous fictions. Its ornaments are concord and love. And having overcome innumerable tribulations, it has remained and shall ever remain unconquered. From this you may readily understand that its origin must be from God, and consequently you shall be able to find in it true solace." Hearing such a speech, I was filled with joy. Thus we went on.

BAPTISM. When we approached nearer, I perceived a gate through which all who wished to enter were obliged to pass. This gate stood in water, through which every applicant must wade and in which he must washe himself, receiving thereupon a badge, white and red in color. Moreover, he must take an oath to observe their laws and regulations, to believe as they do, pray as they do, and keep their ordinances as they do. I was much pleased with this; for it seemed like the beginning of a noble order.

PREACHING THE GOSPEL. Having passed through the gate, I beheld a great multitude of people among whom some were distinguished by their garb from the rest; they were standing on platforms here and there, exhibiting a picture so artistically painted that the more one observed it the more the he found to note. But since the picture was not highly embellished with gold and brilliant colors, it was not clearly visible from a distance. Hence, I noticed that those who stood afar were not greatly allured by its beauty, while those standing nearer could never look at if sufficiently.

4 THE IMAGE OF CHRIST. Those who exhibited this portrait extolled it exceedingly, calling it the Son of God. They professed to find all the most excellent virtues depicted in it; they said that it had been sent into the world from heaven that men might know how to order their own virtues by following it as an example. Thereupon, there arose great rejoicing and exultation among the multitude who, falling on their knees, lifted up their hands to heaven and praised God for it. Seeing this, I also united my voice with theirs and praised the Almighty God for having brought me to this place.

5 SPIRITUAL FEASTS OF CHRISTIANS. In the meantime I heard many and various exhortations, urging all to conform themselves to the portraits. I also observed that those who had been entrusted with the care of the picture gathered themselves at several places and making a small likeness of it, distributed it to all in a kind of wrapping. People then reverently placed it in their mouths. I inquired what this ritual meant and was told that it was not sufficient to look upon the picture outwardly, but that it must likewise be received internally in order that one might be transformed into its beauty. For this heavenly medicine was said to remove sins. Being satisfied with this explanation, I extolled the Christians within myself as blessed among men for possessing such means and aids for the banishing of evil.

LICENTIOUSNESS OF CHRISTIANS. But in the meantime, observing a few who had just a short time before received their god into themselves (as they expressed it), I saw that one after another they gave themselves up to drinking bouts, brawls, uncleanness, and robbery. Not believing my eyes, I watched them more closely and saw in very truth that they got drunk and vomited, quarrelled and fought, defrauded and stole from one another by might and main, neighed and leaped into their license, screamed and shouted, indulged in adultery and fornificatio even worse than any other group I have ever observed. In short, they did everything contrary to the exhortations they had received and the promises they had made. I was deeply grieved by this and exclaimed sorrowfully: "In God's name, what is happening here? I sought here better things!" "Do not express your astonishment so rudely, " my interpreter reproved me, "that which is presented to men for imitation is a degree of perfection that human frailty does not allow every one to attain; the leaders are more perfect; the ordinary man, however, being held back by his evil propensities, is not able to keep up with them." "Let us go among the leaders, then," I suggested, " that I may see them."

7 BARRENNESS OF PREACHERS. Thereuponn, they led me to those who were standing on the platform, exhorting people to admire the beauty of the picture. Nevertheless, they acted somewhat feebly, it seemed to me: for if anyone obeyed them and followed, well and good; if not, it did not matter. A few among them jingled some keys, claiming the power of locking the gate to God to those who would refuse to obey, but as a matter of fact locking it to none; and if they did, it was done in jest. I saw, indeed, that they dared not to do it freely; for if any of the preachers assumed a sharper tone, he was immediately loudly denounced as preaching against individuals. Thus when they could not rebuke sins by the word of mouth, some attempted to do it in writing. But they were dencounced as broadcasting lampoons. People either turned away from them so as not to hear them or threw them down from the platform, setting up more moderate preachers in their stead. Seeing this, I exclaimed: "What a folly to make mere followers and flatteres of their leaders and counsellors!" "Such is the course of the world, " replied my interpreter; "and it does no harm. If those howlers had full liberty, who knows what they would not dare. Even they must be shown where the limits are."

CARNALITY OF THE CLERGY. "Let us go among them, then, " I said, "that I may see how they manage their affairs at home, out of their pulpits. I know that there at leaset no one domineers over them or interferes with them." We entered a building occupied exclusively by priests. I expected to find them at prayers or delving into the mysteries; but on the contrary, I found them lying on feather beds and snoring, or seated behind tables and feasting, gorging themselves with food and drink to speechlessness; some were dancing and skipping about; others were engaged in stuffing their purses, coffers, and treasure-chambers; some indulged in lechery and wantonness; others spent their time in putting on spurs, daggers, rapiers, and muskets; yet others in hunting hares with dogs. They spent the least of their time with the Bible, some scarcely ever taking it into their hands, and yet called themselves teachers of the Word! Seeing this, I exclaimed: "O my grief! Are these supposed to be the leaders to heaven and the examples of virtue? Shall I ever find an;ything in the world free from falsehood and deceit?" Hearing my exclamation, some of the priests perceived my criticism of their irregularities and began to look askance at me and to grumble: that if I were looking for hypocrites and a show of sanctimoniousness, I must look elsewhere; that they knew how to perform their duty both i church and at home, and how to conduct themselves among men manfully. Thus I was reduced to silence, plainly perceiving, however, that to wear a coat of mail over the surplice and a helmet over the biretta was a monstrosity; the Law in one hand, a sword in the other; Peter's keys in front, Judas' bag behind; the mind trained in Scripture, the heart practiced in fraud; the tongue full of piety, the eyes full of wantonness.

9 WITH HEAVENLY GIFTS, THEY HELP OTHERS BUT NOT THEMSELVES. I noticed particularly that some whose sermons were extremely eloquent and full of piety, who were regardedby others as well as by themselves with as great a regard as if they were angels fallen from heaven, yet lived dissolutely as the rest. I could not restrain myself from exclaiming: "Behold, pipes through which good things are conducted, but to which none of the good adheres!" "Even that is a gift of God to be able to preach eloquently about the things of God, " remarked by interpreter. "Indeed it is a gift of God, " I retorted; "but should a man stop with words?"

TRANGRESSIONS OF THE BISHOPS. Meanwhile, perceiving that all these priests had elders above them, called bishops, archbishops, abbots, priors, deans, superintendents, inspectors, etc., who were men of a serious mien and distinction, and who enjoyed general esteem, I thought to myself: Why do they not keep those in the lower ranks in order? Desiring to discover the reason, I followed one of these men into his room, and then a second, a third, a fourth, and so on. I saw that they were so overburdened with work that they could not spare time for supervision. Their occupation, not to mention all the work which they had in common with their clergy, consisted of keeping account of the revenues and the ecclesiastical treasures (as they called it). "I suppose that it is by mistake that they are not called fathers of profits, rather than of +59prophets, " I remarked. "Somebody must take care of the goods which God has bestowed upon the Church, so that they and the endowments of pious forefathers would not be dissipated, " my interpreter answered.

ACTS 6. s Just then one of their number, a man with two keys suspended from his belt--they called him Peter--stepped out and said: "Men and brethren, it is not seemly that we should forsake the Word of God and serve tables and coffers. Let us select, therefore, men of good report, and appoint them over this business: but let us be diligent in prayers and the ministration of the +60Word." Hearing this, I rejoiced, for according to my notion this was good advice. But none of those addressed was willing thus to understand it: all persisted in counting, receiving, and disbursing, while the prayers and the ministry of the Word were either entrusted to others or attended to only perfunctorily.

CHAPTER XIX

THE PILGRIM EXAMINES THE GOVERNING CLASS

THE DIVERS RANK OF NOTABLES. We then entered another street where I saw on all sides a great number of high and low seats, and heard the occupants addressed as the honorable constable, the honorable mayor, the honorable burgomaster, the honorable magistrate, the honorable regent, his lordship the burgrave, his lordship the chancellor, his lordship the viceregent, the honorable judges, his grace the king, or the count, or the lord, and so forth. "Here you see men who pass judgements and sentences in lawsuits, punishing the evil-doers, protecting the good, and thus preserving order in the world, " my interpreter remarked. "This is indeed a splendid thing, and no doubt for mankind a necessary one, " I replied, "but where do such people come from?" "Some are born to their office, " he answered, "while others are selected either by the former, or by their communities, being acknowledged as the wisest and the most experienced of all and the best versed in justice and the laws." "That is also splendid, " I said.

2 Just then my attention was attracted to some who were acquiring seats by bribery, or by importunate solicitation, of by flattery, while some seated themselves therein by force. Seeing this, I cried out: "Look, look, the corruption!" "Keep still, you interfering fool!" warned my interpreter, "or if they should hear you, you would catch it!" "But why do they not wait till they are elected?" I expostulated. "Well, what of it?" he retorted; "doubtless they are confident of being equal to the task. Moreover, as long as others accept them as such, what business is it of yours?"

3 Thereupon, I kept still, and adjusting my glasses, I observed them closely. Thus scrutinizing them, I made an unexpected discovery; for scarcely a single one of them possessed all bodily organs, but each lacked some most necessary limb. Some had no ears with which to hear the grievances of the subjects; others lacked eyes to perceive the evils about them; others lacked the nose wherewith to scent the machinations of crooks plotting against the law; others lacked the tongue with which to defend the mute, oppressed masses; others lacked arms with which to enforce the pronouncements of justice; many even lacked the heart to dare to act in accordance with the dictates of justice.

4 Those, however, who possessed all their bodily organs appeared to me greatly harassed; for they were constantly importuned by petitioners, so that they could hardly eat or sleep in peace. The former, on the contrary, spent more than half of their time in idleness. "But why is law and justice entrusted to people who lack the necessarily bodily organs for the task?" I queried. My interpreter retorted that it was not so, that it only appeared so to me. "For," he said, "whoever knows not how to feign knows not how to rule. He who rules others must often see not, hear not, and understand not, even though he does in fact see, hear, and understand. But you, being inexperienced in politics, cannot understand these things." "Nevertheless, in truth I perceive clearly that they do not possess what they should have, " I persisted. "As to that, I advise you to keep still, " he replied; "otherwise I promise you that unless you cease your impertinent cavils you shall find yourself where you scarcely wish to be. Do you not know that contempt of court is a capital offense?" Thereupon I kept still, but observed all quietly. However, it does not seem necessary to narrate all I saw concerning each of the seats. I shall touch upon but two incidents.

5 FREQUENT TRANSGRESSIONS AND INJUSTICE AMONG JUDGES. I tarried and observed very diligently the procedure in the senatorial court, and learned that the names of the judges were as follows: Atheist, Lovestrife, Hearsayjudge, Partisan, Personrespecter, Lovegold, Bribetake, Tyro, Knowlittle, Dontcare, Hasty, and Anyhow; the President and the Supreme Justice, or Primate, was my Lord Icommandit . I instantly surmised from their names what kind of judges they were like to be; and soon in my presence a case came up which confirmed my surmise. Sincerity was charged by Adversary with having slandered some good people by calling usurers misers, tipplers drunkards, and I do not know what else. The witnesses brought against her were Gossip, Lie, and Suspicion; the prosecuting attorney was named Flatterer, and the counsel for the accused was Prattler, whose services, however, Sincerity declined as unnecessary. Having been asked whether she pleaded guilty [to the charge], she replied: I do , your honors." And she added: "Here I stand; I cannot do otherwise; so help me God!" The judges gathered to cast their votes. Atheist remarked: "What that hussy says is indeed true; but what business is it of hers to babble about it? If we allow her to go one, she will perhaps not spare even us her tongue lashing. I favor her punishment." "Why, of course!" Lovestrife then spoke up, "for if one of them escaped the penalty, others would claim the same immunity!" "Although I really do not know what has happened, " Hearsay judge remarked, "since Adversary ascribes so much importance to the matter, I surmise that he really considers himself injured. Let her be punished. " "I knew in advance that that shrew would blurt out all she knows!" Partisan said, "she needs to have her mouth stopped." "The plaintiff is a good friend of mine, " Personrespecter assented; "she should have spared him at least for my sake, instead of scoffing at him like that. She is worthy of punishment." "You all know how generous Adversary has shown himself; he is worthy of defense, " Lovegold said. "That is what I say, " Bribetake concurred; "we would show ourselves ungrateful, were his suit lost." "I do not know of a similar case; let her suffer whatever she deserves, " Tyro said. "I do not understand the matter; I agree with your judgement, whatever it is, " Knowlittle added. "Whichever you decide, I agree to it, " Anyhow assented. "Would it not be better to postpone the sentence?" Dontcare queried. "The case might decide itself." "No, no, let the sentence be passed while we are so minded!" Hasty exclaimed. "Why, of course, why shouldwe consider anybody else?" the President agreed. "Whatever justice demands, must be done." Then rising, he delivered the sentence: "Whereas the prattling gossip has given herself to such disreputable conduct as to slander good men, we decree that she suffer, for the taming of her unbridled tongue and as a warning unto others, the punishment of forty slaps in her face save one." Thereupon Adversary with the prosecuting attorney and the witnesses, bowing, thanked the judges for their just sentence. Sincerity was urged to do likewise; but she broke into tears and the wringing of hands. Thereupon, for not having rendered honor to the court, her penalty was increased; and seizing her, they led her away to punishment. Seeing that she had been wronged, I could not restrain myself from crying aloud: "If all the courts in the world are like this one, may the Almighty God help me neither to become a judge, nor to have a litigation with anyone!" "Keep still, you raving maniac, " my interpreter cr

6 PERVERSITY OF LAWYERS. When I stopped outside the court house to catch my breath and to clear my eyes, I noticed many bringing their law-suits to the court; moreover, I preceived that a numbe of lawyers (whose names were Babbler, Flatterer, Leadamiss, Prolongsuit, and such) ran to meet them, offering the litigants their services. They did not inquire about the cases, but first examined the litigant's purses. Each lawyer carried with him his own statutes--which thing I had not noticed among the theologians--and diligently searched therein. I got a glimpse of the title of some of the copies, which read,The Rapacious Gnawing of the Land, and The Voracious Defrauding of the +65Land. Unable to witness it any longer, I went away, sighing deeply.

7 THE UNLIMITED POWER OF PRINCES AND THE STRATAGEMS OF THEIR OFFICIALS. "The best is yet to come, " Searchall remarked, "come and see the rule of kings, princes, and other rulers who reign over their subjects by hereditary right; perhaps, you will be pleased with that." We then entered a room where we saw men sitting on such lofty and broad seats that but few could approach or reach them otherwise save by means of mechanical contrivance. Each of these men had long tubes placed in his ears, into which those wishing to communicate with him were obliged to speak. But the tubes were so twisted and full of holes that many words were lost before they reached the ruler's ear. Morevover, the words which did reach his ear were for the greatest part distorted. For that reason I noticed that the petitioners did not always receive an answer; for even though some of them cried loudly, they were not able to reach the ruler's mind. Sometimes one received an answer, but it was irrelevant to the question. The rulers likewise used tubes instead of their eyes and tongue, through which things appeared otherwise than they really were; the answers likewise differed from those intended by the rulers. Perceiving this, I remarked: "But why do they not lay aside those tubes and simply use their own eyes, ears, and tongue just like other folk?" "On account of the dignity of their person and the honor of their position, " my interpreter answered. "Do you consider them peasants that they should permit everyone to rub against their eyes, ears, and tongue?"

8 HOW INCONVENIENT IS THE NECESSITY OF HAVING COUNSELLORS. Just then I perceived certain individuals about the thrones, some of whom, disregarding the tubes, blew some vapors into the rulers' ears, others placed glasses of one or another color on his nose, or burned incense under his nose, or manipulated his hands, or directed his feet, binding or loosening them; while some strengthened and stabilized the seat under them. Observing all this, I inquired: "Who are these persons and what are they doing?" "They are privy counsellors, keeping the king and the great lords informed, " my interpreter answered. "Were I in the place of these great lords, I would not tolerate these people about me but would insist upon the freedom of my limbs and actions. " "A single individual should not depend upon himself so entirely, nor is it permitted them to do so, " he answered. "Then these great lords are worse off than peasants, for they are so bound that without the consent of others they may not even move. " "But on the other hand, " he continued, "they are thus more certain of themselves. Look at these!"

THE MILITARY CALLING

CRUELTY OF MAN. We then entered the last street, in the very first square of which we saw a mob of men dressed in red. I approached them and overheard them discussing how to give wings to death so that it could transport itself instantly from a great distance as well as from nearby. They also debated how to destroy in an hour what had required many years to build. I was terrified by such talk, for all that I had hitherto heard and observed of human labors concerned devising and executing plans for the upbuidling and multiplying of the human race and for the comforts of human life. But these men were discussing how to destroy human life and comfort. "They really have the same aims as the rest, " my interpreter remarked, "but their methods are slightly different. They work by clearing away the obstacles. You will understand it later."

2 RECRUITING. We then approached the gate where we saw, instead of gate-keepers, a number of drummers who asked all who desired to enter for their purses. When each produced and opened it, they filled it with money and said: "This skin is paid for."

3 THE ARSENAL OR ARMORY. Thereupon they took the recruit into a cellar from which he emerged encasedd in iron and fire. Then they ordered him to proceed to the square. Desiring to see what was in the cellar, I descended into it. There I beheld heaps of weapons lying on the ground, piled up in enormous stacks and covering all the walls as far as the eye could see, so that many thousands of wagon loads would not suffice to remove the accumulation. There were all kinds of terrible weapons for piercing, hacking, slashing, stabbing, felling, chopping, severing, tearing, burning, and, in a word, killing: they mere made of iron, lead, wood, and stone. "What wild beasts are these weapons intended for?" I cried out, seized with terror. "Against men, " rejoined my interpreter. "Against men?" I echoed. "I though they were against some mad beasts or wild, ferocious animals. But, in God's name, what a cruelty for men to invent such frightful weapons against men?" "Are you so pampered?" he answered, laughing at me.

4 THE LIFE OF SOLDIERS IS LICENTIOUS. Coming out, we proceeded farther into the square where I saw those iron-clad swash-bucklers, equipped with horns and claws, bound one to another in herds. They were just lying down in front of troughs and jugs into which their food and drink had been dumped and poured, and which they gobbled and lapped, vying with each other in haste. "Are they swine fattening for the slaughter-house?" I remarked; "I indeed perceive human appearance, but swinish behavior." "Such is the privilege of this particular calling, " replied my interpreter. Just then they got up from the troughs and began dancing, skipping, frolicking, and shouting. "Observe now the delights of their life," my interpreter continued. "What do they worry about! Is it not merry here?" "I shall wait for what follows, " I replied. In the meantime, the soldiers began chasing and robbing the civilians whom they chanced to encounter. Then casting themselves on the ground, they committed all kinds of sodomy and lechery without the slightest trace of shame or fear of God until I blushed. "This should not be tolerated!" I exclaimed. "But it must be tolerated, " rejoined my interpreter, "for their calling demands every kind of freedom." Thereupon they sat down and again began gorging themselves until, surfeited to dumbness with eating and drinking, they flopped down and fell to snoring. Then they were led out to the square and there exposed to rain, snow, hail, frost, sleet, thirst, hunger and other discomforts; hence not a few of them shook, trembled, pined away, and perished, to become food for dogs and crows. But the rest took no heed of them, continuing their revels.

5 DESCRIPTION OF THE BATTLE. Suddenly drums sounded, trumpets blared, and a tumultuous crying arose. The soldiers jumped up and seizing their daggers, dirks, poniards, or whatever else each had, began to plunge them mercilessly into each other until blood spurted all around. They cut and hacked each other worse than the most ferocious beasts. The din increased in all directions; one heard the beat of horses' hoofs, the clanging of cuirasses, the clash of swords, the booming of cannon, the whizzing of shots and bullets past the ear, the blare of trumpets, the beating of drums, the outcries of those urging on the battle, the shouts of the victors, the shrieks of the wounded and the dying. In one place I saw a terrible hail of lead; in another I saw the frightful lightning of fire and heard the sound of thundering. Here a soldier lost his arm, the head, or a leg; in another, I saw the frightful lightning of fire and heard the sound of thundering. Here a soldier lost his arm, the head, or a leg; there they fell one upon the other in a heap, all writhing in pools of +67blood. "Almighty God, what is happening?" I cried out; "is the world collapsing?" Gathering my wits somewhat, I ran away from that place scarcely knowing how and whither; then stopping to catch my breath, but still trembling all over, I cried reproachfully to my guides: "What pandemonium have you led me into?" "Is there a greater mollycoddle than you?" my interpreter retorted. "To be able to attack others is to be a man!" "But what wrong have they done each other?" I persisted. "Their masters disagreed and it had to be settled in this manner, " he replied. "Oh, is this a mere settling of a disagreement?" I exclaimed. "Why, of course!" he rejoined. "For how could the disagreements of great lords, kings, and kingdoms, which acknowledge no judge over them, otherwise be settled? They must determine such cases among themselves by the sword. Whoever flourishes his sword and directs his fire more dexterously, his contention wins the day." "Oh, the barbarity and the beastliness of it!" I cried, "are there no other ways of +68pacification? Such methods of peacemaking befit wildbeasts, not men!"

6 SURVIVORS OF THE BATTLE. Just then I perceived not a few with severed arms, or legs, or a split skull or nose, with riddled bodies, or lacerated skin, all bespattered with blood, being led or carried from the battlefield. I could hardly bear to look upon them for pity. "It will all heal; a soldier must be hardy, " my interpreter remarked. "But what about those who had lost their lives altogether?" I asked. "Their skin had already been paid for," he rejoined. "How is that?" I inquired. "Didn't you notice the comforts they had been granted?" "Yes, but I likewise observed how much discomfort they had to suffer, " I replied. "But even if they have previously lived in the utmost pleasure, it is a miserable thing to feed a man in order straightway to lead him to a slaughter-house. This is a disgusting career, taken all in all; and I will have nothing to do with it. Let us go away."

CHAPTER XXI

THE KNIGHTLY ORDER

WHEREFORE NOBILITY AND COATS-OF-ARMS ARE BESTOWED. "Observe at least how highly honored are those who fight valiantly and win against all swords, pikes, arrows, and bullets, " my interpreter said. Thereupon, they led me to a palace where I saw a personage sitting under a majestic canopy, summoning before him such as had proved themselves valorous. Many came, bringing their enemies' skulls, limbs, ribs, and hands, as well as pillaged and plundered purses and bags; receiving in return his praise for these deeds, and the personage under the canopy presented them with a painted device, granting them certain extraordinary privileges above those enjoyed by all others; which they stuck on a staff and carried about for the admiration of all.

2 OTHERS ALSO CROWD INTO THIS CLASS. Observing this, others followed suit; for not only those of the fighting class, as had been the custom formerly, but many from the artisan and the learned classes presented themselves, although boasting